Make' em uncomfortable

In this world there is a group of people I just can't stand. We all know them, and I know we all hate them. Hate, is not a word I use lightly, but these people really spark a fire up in my ass. The word I use to describe them, is the "comfy" class. This is a hideous group of people indeed. A group of people that must be turned into the "uncomfy" class, before they affect you, or someone you really love. We have all felt the sting of the "comfy" class. The most classic group of people in the "comfy" class are the "ATM'S". I call them the ATM'S, not because they GIVE money like an ATM, but they are ALWAYS TAKING MONEY. Usually this money is YOURS. The story is always the same "I get paid on Friday, I'll give it to you then". The problem is, they never tell you WHICH Friday. Being they leave themselves a lot of leeway by just saying "Friday", they could mean this Friday, next Friday, or the first Friday in the year 2025. Next in line are "the borrowers". The favorite line used by this group of dingleberrys is "I'll bring it back tomorrow". Well, for some reason, just like the title of the classic Frank Sinatra song "tomorrow never comes", it never comes for the stuff that gets borrowed neither. These folks purposely say tomorrow instead of lets say....Thursday, because then you can't call them a fucking liar when your shit doesn't come back. You lose, they win, case closed. Hey, lets not forget the "shit don't stinks". Theres always one in every group of friends or employees. This is the ego-testicle prick who thinks he/she is gods gift to beauty, brains...etc. And no, I did not mis-spell egotisticle, I ment to write ego-testicle. I could write a whole fucking novel about these a-holes, but the term is self explanitory. With out a doubt, the worst of the "comfy" class are the "put downs". These are the ones that always say mean shit, to make themselves feel better. It isn't bad enough these dick bags say mean shit that make people feel bad, but they usually pick the right moment in time, to bring a person down as far as they possibley can with one blow. Do you know why they do this ? Cause it just makes them feel good. A great example of this, is a great looking girl moves in next door. Boy is she pretty, and she seems really sweet too. You think she may like you. You catch her looking your way when you walk to your apartment. She always seems to go out of her way, to say hello to you. It takes you weeks to build up the courage to ask her out. The weekend is coming, and you know in your heart, its time. It is time to ask her to go out with you. You see her outside, at the mailbox. You dash into the bathroom, and with two quick squirts of cologne, you rush out the door. As you approach her, you can feel the sweat dripping down your neck. Your eyes meet, the words are almost there, but here comes ole' dick bag. You know it won't be good. "Is it me or did you gain about twenty pounds. Your looking pretty chubby". This same dick bag then turns his attention towards her, and with out a moments hesitation he says "what are you doing this weekend, I would love to take you to dinner". Strikes one, two, and three...your out. The morale of the story is this. If you allow it, the "comfy" class will run all over you. I have spent my entire life going after these assholes. Nothing makes me feel better, than chopping one of these jerk offs down to size. I know it will be hard for you at first, believe me it takes some time developing all of the one liners, and balls big enough to go head to head with these fuckers, but ooohhhh the satisfaction you'll get once you do. The reality is, you actually might be a little let down, because the "comfys" are quite easy to defeat. Its kinda like that really big guy that everyones afraid of, but because he has never had to fight, he doesn't know how. When that big fucker finally throws blows with someone, nine out of ten times, they get their heads handed to them on a silver plater. Just remember, when of these fuck heads feels "comfy" enough to ethier ask you for something, or hurt your feelings, by all means, feel "comfy" enough to tell them to fuck off and die. Be safe, Ferg